So I just got done watching this week's episode of The Hills. And The Hills Aftershow. Actually, this is the first time I've ever watched the Aftershow, simply because the hosts of the half-hour gossip rag annoy the crap out of me. But this week was different. It's almost like I watched it and I couldn't believe what I saw so I needed a little clarification. A little perspective.
In a nutshell, I continue to be bewildered by the Speidi union (which has officially become a union since they were married last week in Cabo with no friends or family around). He is such a douche-bag. Not only that, you never ever see even a hint of a tender moment between them. Even his welcome home to Heidi when she walks through the door at the end of a day drips with sarcasm and condescension. There's absolutely nothing redeeming about Spencer. He's not cute (matter of fact those chin pubes make me gag), he's not employed (though he sure knows how to spend cash), and he's not nice. Granted we don't know what goes on behind closed doors, but more importantly, we doknow what goes on in public - for the WORLD to see - and none of it demonstrates even the least bit of respect or love for his fiancee (now wife). Another fishy thing is that this girl looks NOTHING like she did a few years ago. Her hair is 40 shades lighter than it was, her boobs 40 sizes bigger, and her face looks distorted (what's up with those balloon lips?) This transformation alone reeks of unhappiness.
May they live happily ever after. I guess.
Then there's the Audrina story line. Does she seriously believe that Lauren, who has made no bones about her feelings for Justin-Bobby (none too complimentary), would go and "hook-up" with him? (does that mean sex, btw? not sure.) I mean FO REALZ?? I'm sort of glad Lauren told Audrina that he's a vile, disgusting human being because Audrina is GORGEOUS and can do so much better. The funniest part oft he episode was their "talk" in the bar with like 10 other people sitting there. Really girls? Did'ja think you were going to accomplish anything in that setting? Come on now.
Then there's my initial concern about the "reality" of the show. I mean, did Audrina wait till the camera crew got there to leave that message for Justin-Bobby? Or do they lure her (with money I guess) into throwing them a bone? It just all seems unnatural. Did Heidi really just walk away from Spencer when she clearly caught him not telling her that her sister had been looking for her? I wanted to scream - HEIDI - HE'S A LIAR! AND A LOSER! AND HE HAS CHIN-PUBES! But it seems that Heidi ain't looking for opinions about her new hubby. Probably because she's perfectly aware of the general concensus that he's a first-class asshole.
The simple fact that Heidi and Spencer got married when ALL we see is them fighting is testament that my concern is valid. I have to say, I think The Hills should run for them before they sink so low, they'll have to re-name it The Valley...
This post is dedicated to my sister, Karyn.













