I don't remember playing with Barbie as a child. I remember Cabbage Patch Kids, Easy Bake Ovens (nothing like cooking by light bulb) and Lite Brite, but not much in the way of Barbie or her friends. In fact, I can recall seeing one of those hot pink Barbie convertibles at a friend's house and being very interested in it because I didn't have one of my own and because it was so big and pink. I don't think there was any moral reason why I had no Barbie in my toy collection (my parents took me to see Porky's when I was 7 by "accident"), it probably had more to do with a low interest level.
So imagine my surprise when my four-year-old daughter asked for the "new" Barbie for her birthday. When she couldn't remember exactly which one it was, her older sister chimed in. "It's Barbie Goes to Charm School, Mom." Right.
She's five.
Gotta love TV commercials aimed at five-year-old's.
When a friend asked for an idea of what to get Sabrina for her b-day, I relayed the message. Charm School Barbie. And as a mom to two boys, she couldn't wait to hit the store to pick up a doll.
So, Barbie showed up last night. What is a Charm School Barbie, right? Well, she's dressed in a pink bustier, has on a multi-layered skirt, and is topped off with a tiara. The skirt is long but when you wind up Barbie (from the rear, of course), the long layer disappears into the short part and voila - fun-time Barbie takes the place of proper Barbie.
Or as I like to call her, Madonna and the Whore Barbie.
In case you need a visual:
Of course, Barbie comes with a clip-on t-shirt for the more virtuous look (probably to cover up when she goes home to her parents).
There's something about Barbie in general that I find less-than innocent. I don't know if it's her tiny waist against those gimormous boobs, or the fact that she's always decked out in these hot, sexy outfits. Something about those big baby blues and that innocent smile.
Or maybe it has to do with the fact that I've stumbled upon this scenario in my own homen more than once:
Or this:
Soooooooo fun! Or whatever.
In any case, I'm calling a moratorium on Barbie presents in our house for a while. And while we're at it, what exactly are they teaching at charm school, anyways?
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