The Daily Grind of a Work @ Home Mom...

So this is somewhat off topic but...

I just found out Eric Dane has a "sex tape."  In case you've been living under a rock, Eric Dane is Grey's Anatomy's McSteamy and one seriously hot piece of guy.  He is hot in the way that he oozes sex and you just want to meet him somewhere dirty and get naked and then return him to his rightful owner.  Not like McDreamy, who you might just want to cuddle with after. 

Look:

 

YUM.

So, I know I'm late to the game, but I just heard about this so-called "sex tape" so in my spare time (ha), I googled Eric Dane Sex Tape.  What I found was basically an intimate evening at home with hot-man himself, his cute wife, Rebecca Gayheart, and some no-name former beauty queen.  They get high, hang out in a tub not big enough for three, and chat.  While naked.  No sex.  Boobs and wieners, but no sex.

So now that I watched my #1 man (k, #2, after all I am married) strut around with his wanker hanging out, with no hot scrubs or lab coat to make me wonder what's hiding under there, I feel like I've just unwrapped a gift I *really* wanted, just to find out I may not have wanted it so much after all.

I guess there's something about mystery that is intoxicating but once mystery is exposed to the cruel light of day, eh... Whatever...

PS...  It's entirely possible that this post contains material inappropriate for a married woman & mom, but hey, a girl's gotta live!! 

Super Why! A Children's Show for Smart Kids (and the adults who watch with them).

Sometimes, as a blogger, I get to do very cool things.  Like recently, I was invited to a behind-the-scenes look at one PBS Kids most popular shows for preschoolers, SUPER WHY!  So as a mom that lets my kids watch television (boo!  hiss!), I was stoked to learn more about what goes into kids' programming and, as a celebrity stalker, to meet the creator of the show, Angela Santomero.

Ok, maybe "celebrity" is pushing it, but not if you ask my kids.  They LOVE SUPER WHY!  and as a parent, it was interesting to hear the details about why a new children's show even gets created, and what type of research goes into it.  Here are some interesting facts I picked up:

• A new series gets built as a result of a need.  Like, when there was a need for programming with a literacy curriculum, SUPER WHY! and Martha Speaks were created.  Sid the Science Kid obviously covers early science exploration, and (betcha didn't know this) Curious George's curiosity introduces preschoolers to key concepts in math, science and engineering. 
• Ever want to pull your hair out because the kids morning show is THE SAME episode as yesterday?  And last week?  This is actually done purposefully since repetition is good for young kids. 
• Oh, and funding is most definitely a problem.

And you thought they were losing brain cells while watching TV.

I was duly impressed with the amount of research that goes into making these shows.  Focus groups, expert consultations, testing - you name it.  Nothing happens by accidentand it shows.  To hear Ms. Santomero talk about the characters and story-lines, you'd think she was discussing a Shakespearean play - that's how well-thought out the plots are, and when I got home, I tested this all out on my 3-year-old.

She named every character and explained their "powers".  She and her not quite 2-year-old sister can sing the re-invented alphabet song (see below if you're not familiar with the tune), and she can even name some of the letters she sees on the screen.  Not bad for 3.

I was not one of those parents who didn't let their kids watch tv until the recommended age of 2.  I am, however, a parent who enjoys watching with my kids, even if I'm doing other things as we watch.  And it seems I'm not alone.  Many of the parents in the session were thrilled to invite Super Why!  into their living room each day because it's a) entertaining for kids and b) NOT ANNOYING FOR ADULTS!! 

To learn more about Super Why!, visit the PBS Kids website and join their Facebook group (and then you can say you're a Super Why! groupie... ;).  

 

 

RIP MJ

I just finished watching Michael Jackson's memorial service.  While I didn't begin my day with plans to watch it, I have to say that I'm glad I did and that I was moved by it.

When I first saw the news alert that MJ had been taken to the hospital in apparent cardiac arrest, I IM'd my sister what I'd learned and wrote "Can you imagine if Michael Jackson dies?"  It was the same day Farrah Fawcett died and I believe Ed McMahon was the day before.  Iran was chaos, unemployment numbers were reaching new highs and the economy was, and is, crazy low.  I felt like the world's mood followed the recent weather - grey, rainy, and just down altogether.

Obviously it wasn't an hour before news of MJ's death spread like wildfire, no - faster than a wildfire - across the world.  Instantaneously, it was all MJ all the time.  Every news station was carrying emerging details, some accurate, others less so, surrounding this mysterious death.  

The world was in a state of shock.

I heard people who were upset that MJ's death was upstaging Farrah.  How ridiculous.  If we were actually engaging in a game of 'my death is bigger than your death', I hate to say it, but MJ would win (did I really just say that?).  I actually hadn't known much about Farrah until I watched her documentary which aired about a month before she died.  I felt like I got to know her a little bit in those few hours, and I got to like her as well.  I thought about her every day after that, and was sad when she died.  But while her death was a tragedy, it was hardly a shock.  Nor did it hold any mystery.  MJ's did.  And so, the world wanted to know about the seemingly constant developments.

MJ was also about as big a star as one could be.  Granted his celebrity was often shrouded in strange goings-on as well as negative press, but he was, after all the King of Pop.  Personally, I can recall going to see Michael Jackson's Victory tour in September of 1984.  I was 9 years old and it was the first concert I had been to.  I remember wearing earplugs so as not to burst my fragile, young eardrums.  Tickets cost a whopping $40, considered outrageously expensive at the time.

Even then, there was an air of mystique around him.  Reporters in this 25-year-old piece which aired on Canada's CBC, contributed to the weird rumors that swirled about MJ, including that he talked to mannequins and lived with animals. 

Based on what he would later endure, these allegations were child's play.

Years later, his death is as big as any news of his life.  Only now, we've come to pay tribute to this musical genius, and we seem to have forgotten what we did to him while he lived.  Suffice to say, MJ was put through the wringer, publicly ridiculed and accused of lewd and illegal behavior.  I can't really remember what my thoughts were at the time of the trial, but based on my ambivalence on the topic, I don't think I ever felt passionately one way or the other.

But now it doesn't matter.  But for some reason, it's bugging me that the same media who brought him down is working overtime to inflate his memory to enormous, almost God-like proportions.  I'm grateful to people like Brooke Shiels and his daughter, Paris, for making sure the public knew he was simply an awesome friend, and a wonderful daddy. 

From what I've seen, read, and heard, throughout his life, Michael Jackson only wanted approval.  And it's sad that only in death is he finally achieving what he sought after during his 50 years on earth. 

What goes around comes around.

Look, I don't condone violence.  I don't think using force solves problems, nor do I think it gets a point across.  But Perez Hilton, I do believe in karma.

Karma: that which causes the entire cycle of cause and effect.

Cause: Perez Hilton is long since infamous for offering up his own crass reviews of Hollywood gossip.  He is not shy to opine on, well, anything related to, well, anything.  This is truly critiques without boundaries.

Effect:  He got the crap beat outta him.

Only surprise here is that it hasn't happened sooner.  And remember when I said I don't condone violence?  I also think Hilton got what was coming to him.

Have you watched his loooong vlog which tells his side of the story?  In it, he appears distraught (understandably) but makes some remarks which prove that this "guy" thinks the rules of engagement don't apply to him.  After going through his version of the event, Hilton goes on about how he likes to write about the drama in other people's lives, but that he doesn't want drama in his.

Uh, SERIOUSLY?

Ok - this is deranged on so many levels.  First, if you're the biggest gossip in town, people are NOT gonna like you.  And you know, don't be surprised if they talk crap about you too.  After all, you invented the no-holds-barred approach.

Second - don't you, as a citizen of the world, have some responsibility to it?  Like, are there boundaries at all?  Clearly not since you attack mere children and go on and on about their looks, their bodies, their talent.  (hey, Bruce Willis, where were you when Fight Club broke out?)

Third - why aren't the celebs that he slanders on a daily basis suing this loser?  What about verbal assault?  Imagine sleeping at night knowing you make your living spewing libelous and horrible crap about others on the Internet?  Knowing that what you contribute to the world does nothing other than pollute it?

EW.

Perez Hilton is playing a victim.  This guy needs to get real.  He victimizes the people he badmouths every day.  They are not present to defend themselves against his ridiculous words, the way he was present to defend himself in the fight.  He could've walked away.  He could've taken the high road.  Instead, he hung around (who wouldn't have hit the guy?) then proceded to Tweet/cry to the public.  Words aren't gonna get you very far this time, Perez.

Here's the real issue.  What is this world coming to?  Why are we so anti-everything and everyone?  I know, I know, I blog constantly about the reality TV "people" and have called them d-bags and boring and whatever else I have thought.  But do Heidi & Spencer really count anyway?  Joke people, joke. ;)

Bottom line is anyone who dedicates their life's ambition to gossip and the mean-spirited dissemination of information deserves to get cracked in the face.

Maybe it'll be an improvement anyway.

 

I'm a... Nobody! Get Me Outta Here!

I'm ashamed and embarassed to admit that I wasted two hours of my life watching NBC's filler show, I'm a Celebrity, Get Me Outta Here last night.  But man am I glad I did, because secretly it was total entertainment.

The premise of the show is that it drops 10 "celebrities" (and I use that term VEEEERRRYYYY loosely) in the jungle for 3 weeks while they're meant to be testing their survival skills through challenges and basic deprivation of everyday luxuries.  Sound familiar?  Well truth be told, "Celebrity" compares to Survivor in the way that your faux Louis compares to the real thing - bad workmanship, poor quality, and that speckle of embarassment you feel every time you wear it.

Details aside, it's important to note who these "celebrities" are:

• Heidi Montag - Reality "star" who plays the dis-loyal ex-friend on MTV's The Hills.
• Spencer Pratt - Heidi's d-bag husband who continues to show the world that his douchiness knows no bounds.
• John Salley - Retired NBA player who I hadn't heard of (which means nothing since I'm not a bball fan).
• Lou Diamond Phillips - Dust off your memory and you might remember him from such movies as La Bamba and... well, La Bamba.
• Sanjaya Malakar - That strange American Idol finalist, season 6.
• Stephen Baldwin - Oy, Stephen Baldwin.  As his brothers continue to appear in prime time, Stephen incessantly shows up on reality shows in a desperate attempt to not fall off the face of the earth.  It is my contention that true torture involves being locked in a room with Stephen Baldwin for any amount of time.
• Torrie Wilson - Retired professional wrestler whom I hadn't heard of.
• "Frangela" - Really two people, Frangela is a comedy duo who are large and in charge and actually hysterically funny (in the "I was laughing WITH them not at them" genre).
• Patti Blagojevich - You know that Illinois governor who was accused of bribery?  Well, they wanted him on the show but since he's currently the target of several federal investigations, he wasn't allowed to leave the country to do this.  So his wife Patti is filling in for him, poor thing.

Ok, so the "celebs" are dropped in the jungle and it doesn't take long before Heidi and Spencer are bitching and moaning about well, everything.  Upon entering her new home, she took in her surroundings, including the wildlife and sweetly proclaimed, "is that a reallmonkey?"  If she had been in the running for dumbest bottled-blonde ever, she'd win hands down.

Yada yada yada, there was a challenge in which the "celebrities" ate bugs, yada yada, Spencer went ballistic and lost it on Frangela, yada yada, he and Heids decided to quit so they made a whole stink sbout it, ruined one of the producer's evenings by calling him and moaning, had their belongings raided by the other "mean" contestants, and on it went.  Heids went to the confessional and with no makeup to stream down her sweaty and almost unrecognizable-without-makeup-face, and had this to say:

Ok, so this two-hour show turned quickly into the Spencer & Heidi show but really, they only showed America what we already knew about them - that these are two money-hungry, celebrity-chasing losers who have an unrealistic and inflated self of themselves and seem to succeed only at alienating any public that might otherwise enjoy their shenanigans.  (I should note that Spencer, in one of his boring tirades ranted that "The cast is degrading our fame right now".)  Fame?  Seriously, WHAT fame? 

Perhaps he meant fleeting infamy. ?

In any event, after a long two-hours which included a moment of prayer between Speidi and problem-laden Blagojevitch, a funny Heidi imitation by Torrie Wilson, a few ridiculously annoying comments by Stephen Baldwin, and two attempts to quit the show by, you guessed it, icky icky Speidi, the duo did actually go back on their promise to be the king and queen of the jungle and subsequently quit the show after it aired.

But not before they made this video.  Note: watch only if you're not already convinced of the crazy amount of ego stuffed into these people.  Also, prepare for side-splitting laughter.

 

Khloe Kardashian Does PETA

I watch Keeping Up with the Karsdashians on E.  Not only am I enjoying this season's shenanigans, but I've kept up with all the episodes, simply because it entertains me.

There.  I said it.

Last week on the show, Khloe, Kim's sister, was asked to pose nude for PETA's "I'd Rather Go Nude" campaign.  I am not sure Khloe had ever given much thought to fur and how it gets from the animals to the stores, but visiting with PETA and watching their footage opened her eyes to what, I'm sure, is a big problem.  I have never been a big fan of fur wearing, just because it seems wrong (and is hideous in my opinion).  And I caught enough glimpses of the shocking footage that made Khloe's decision easy, and I was appalled by what I saw. 

But enough about that.

Apart from the fact that animals are mis-treated so that people like the Olson twins and Kanye can sport their furs (btw, only thing uglier than a woman in fur is a man in fur), it was interesting to see Khloe's reaction to being asked to pose nude.  In case us regular people thought we were the only ones who were feeling self-conscious about our less than perfect bods, rest assured that even those with millions in the bank and famous 'rents have fat days too.

It's not that this makes me feel better about myself.  In fact, it only makes me feel better about these seemingly "have-it-all" celebs who are wrought with the same imperfections as the rest of us.  It never occurred to me that Khloe Kardashian might have a thing about her body, though it appears she is constantly compared to her two svelte sisters.  It is my opinion that Khloe is a beautiful woman, and if she's bigger than the typical size 0 celeb, so be it.  I can't imagine spending my life worrying about whether I was too big, too small, too short, too tall, as do these celebs.  In my regular plebian life I already worry about my body enough to make anyone nuts, and no one is snapping shots of me on a regular basis.  I never would've thought Khloe to be self-conscious about these things, though it makes sense that she is.

After all, she's a woman living in Hollywood.  That about encompasses the last thing I'd want to be. 

I think Khloe's picture came out great.  I'm sure there was a little touching up here and there but really who cares. 

Great shot, great cause, great job!

Twilight, the Movie.

After several unsuccessful attempts to get to the theater, one DVD that went missing, and another that just wouldn't function, I FINALLY saw Twilight last night and now I get what the hype's about.

I bought Twilight, the book, in an airport on the way to Vegas in September.  I had seen it tweeted about a bunch of times and was curious.  But not a fan of the fantasy/sci-fi'ish genre that Twillight might classify under, I was skeptical and bought a back-up read, just in case.  But I was hooked from the day Bella Swan arrived in Forks until the last page and subsequently went on to order the other 3 books in the saga.  I made a deal with myself that I would't see the movie until I had read all 4 books in case the movie skipped ahead and covered some things that were in a future book (as movie adaptations often do). 

Within a month or so, I was done. 

But something kept getting in the way of seeing the movie so I waited for the DVD release.  And I must say, it was worth the wait.

I didn't have high hopes, I'm used to being let down by movies of books.  After all, have you seen Flowers in the Attic?  YIKES.  In any case, I thought Hollywood did a great job of capturing the essence of Bella and Edward and even managed to portray the intensity of their relationship in a understated yet obvious way.  It was fast-moving like the book, and not drawn-out so as to lose my attention (short attention span - guilty!).  The way Edward appeared to Bella in the sun was beautiful, Bella's simple beauty, the Cullen Family's physical perfection - all done with just the right amount of, well, Hollywood, for it to match what had previously existed only in my mind.

A personal highlight was the fiery red-headed Victoria (who I know IRL as we used to move in a similar circle in growing up in Montreal) who was PERFECT as the evil vampire and who I can't wait to see in New Moon.  I thought the cast was really well chosen, including Robert Pattinson who didn't really appeal to me in his interviews and appearances.  (I guess that means I'm not in love with him as "himself", but as Edward - bring it!).  

But the real gem of the night came when we were about 15 minutes into the movie and my husband says, "so what's the deal?  Are they aliens or something?"     

Strange Days

There are always strange stories in the news.  Every morning news broadcast includes a regular serving of hard news and a sprinkling of head-scratchers that actually make it more interesting.  Lately there seems to be some real doozies.  Here are a few that have me wondering how people can actually live with themselves.

* The Octuplet Mom.  Nothing really major here, just the fact that this single mother to 14children has time to be on the news, every magazine show and in every major magazine every day/week.  I mean, you'd think she'd be frantically running between the hospital, where her 8 tiny newborns lay, and being in her home where her other kids, aged 2 to 7, are undoubtedly needing their mother.  But somehow she has time for every news outlet that comes a'knocking.  Or so it seems.

* The woman who called 911 three times after being told that McDonald's was out of Chicken McNuggets.  Yes, you read correctly.  She must've been really desperate for fried bits of "chicken."

* The guy who stuffed his cat in a bong and smoked it.  I couldn't make this stuff up now, could I?  He was trying to chill out his hyper cat so he stuffed her into a boxlike homemade bong.  If you're trying to picture this, the 20-year-old moron was smoking through a piece of garden hose attached to a duct-taped, plastic glass box in which the cat had been stuffed.  He's facing drug charges, was cited for misdemeanor animal cruelty and paid a $400 fine.  I think someone should stuff him inside a bong and smoke him.  Or something...     

And in other plain old BAD news:

* The L-Word, Showtime's weekly show about a group of lesbian's in the LA area, is coming to an end on Sunday.  As a straight woman living in the Boston area, the L-Word has become my favorite guilty pleasure.  Almost like the pleasure a voyeur derives from watching people.  Weird, I know.  But hold on!  Showtime has confirmed a spin-off!!  See deets here(but it contains a spoiler about who killed Jenny so read at your own risk!).

* Grey's Anatomy is a repeat.  Don't they know I plan my whole Thursday night around this show??  Damn!

* Rihanna has taken back her abusive boyfriend, Chris Brown.  It's a sad moment for women everywhere.  Who am I to judge but come on.  I mean, really. 

 

The City is not as hot as The Hills

Ok, so I wasn't going to post about The City, MTV's newest crash site, but I have to.  I have to because in the unlikely event that any of these characters has a Google alert set for themselves (and who doesn't), I feel like I have a few things I need to get off my chest.

First, for you non-MTV watching readers (whoever you may be), The City is the spin-off to The Hills which is the spin-off to Laguna Beach.  So over the last few years, we've watched spoiled rich kids in Laguna become spoiled rich kids in L.A. become spoiled rich kids in NYC.  It's uber-interesting.  During the shows' runs, they've picked up new characters with which to make the spin-offs. 

So, fresh off the tail of Lauren Conrad comes Whitney Port, a California girl who moved to NYC to work at Diane Von Furstenberg and breathe life into yet another voyeuristic-type "reality" show that I now need like a junkie needs crack.  Whitney arrives, starts a relationship with a boy she met on a previous trip to the city, meets a new gaggle of girls, and drama ensues.  For deets, watch the show!

Ok - so here are my thoughts:

Whitney Port - Oh Whitney, I loved you as LC's sidekick on The Hills, but I'm not sure you're enough of a drama-magnet to hold your own.  I sort of liked that you maintained a tight-lipped behind-the-scenes type role before, but as the anchor, I'm not sure you'll make it.  I will say though, I admire the energy you put into your (typically) incredible style, though that ski-band you wore around your head last week was A-W-F-U-L, by anyone's standards.  Maybe it was cold out.  Oh, and that Jay character?  If it walks like a liar and it quacks like a liar...

Erin Williams - Erin, daughter of the bassist for AC/DC, is pretty much the ONLY character on the show I can say is cool.  She's down-to-earth, seemingly unaffected by the riches she undoubtedly has at her disposal, and not as worried about what everyone thinks as the others.  Her style is laid-back "downtown" and her boyfriend is Canadian.  Props, Erin, props.  

Olivia Palermo- From the moment this girl entered my living room by way of The City, I knew she would have the same effect on my stomach as eating bad sushi.  A self-proclaimed "social" (short for socialite - what the eff is a socialite anyhow?  How could this be a title someone wears with pride???), Olivia is making stomachs churn nationwide.  In fact, every time she speaks, I throw up a little in my mouth.  This girl is SO affected, so elitist, so obnoxiously vile and rude, I can't imagine she has one true relationship.  Olivia - don't smile, your face might crack honey.  And that gay cousin of hers - Nevan- seriously dude?  Are you for real?  You know that thing that people do for money in the real world called a job?  I know you think it's beneath you, but you and your Ferragamo footwear are homeless.  Also, in case you hadn't heard, there's a warrant out for your arrest.  (mug shot to the right).  Might want to deal with that.       

Allie.  Allie, I feel for you.  Really I do.  You're adorable (if in a stick-figure sort of way), seem to have a decent career in modeling, but hon?  HE'S CHEATING ON YOU.  Really, he is.  The signs are there, you see them as clearly as the rest of us.  He might be cute, but he's lying.  I'm sorry sweetie.  You'll meet someone else who doesn't keep lying even after his number is up.  That last episode was hard to watch, while he denied lied denied lied over and over and over past the point of belief.  Maybe watching yourself accept his lies on MTV will wake you  up.  Sigh...

So anyway, while it might seem like there's lots of dirty stuff going on in The City, the truth is, it was waaaay hotter in Cali.  I'm even sort of starting to miss Speidi...

The Hills Sinks to The Valley

So I just got done watching this week's episode of The Hills.  And The Hills Aftershow.  Actually, this is the first time I've ever watched the Aftershow, simply because the hosts of the half-hour gossip rag annoy the crap out of me.  But this week was different.  It's almost like I watched it and I couldn't believe what I saw so I needed a little clarification.  A little perspective.

In a nutshell, I continue to be bewildered by the Speidi union (which has officially become a union since they were married last week in Cabo with no friends or family around).  He is such a douche-bag.  Not only that, you never ever see even a hint of a tender moment between them.  Even his welcome home to Heidi when she walks through the door at the end of a day drips with sarcasm and condescension.  There's absolutely nothing redeeming about Spencer.  He's not cute (matter of fact those chin pubes make me gag), he's not employed (though he sure knows how to spend cash), and he's not nice.  Granted we don't know what goes on behind closed doors, but more importantly, we doknow what goes on in public - for the WORLD to see - and none of it demonstrates even the least bit of respect or love for his fiancee (now wife).  Another fishy thing is that this girl looks NOTHING like she did a few years ago.  Her hair is 40 shades lighter than it was, her boobs 40 sizes bigger, and her face looks distorted (what's up with those balloon lips?)  This transformation alone reeks of unhappiness.

May they live happily ever after.  I guess.

Then there's the Audrina story line.  Does she seriously believe that Lauren, who has made no bones about her feelings for Justin-Bobby (none too complimentary), would go and "hook-up" with him?  (does that mean sex, btw?  not sure.)  I mean FO REALZ??  I'm sort of glad Lauren told Audrina that he's a vile, disgusting human being because Audrina is GORGEOUS and can do so much better.  The funniest part oft he episode was their "talk" in the bar with like 10 other people sitting there.  Really girls?  Did'ja think you were going to accomplish anything in that setting?  Come on now.

Then there's my initial concern about the "reality" of the show.  I mean, did Audrina wait till the camera crew got there to leave that message for Justin-Bobby?  Or do they lure her (with money I guess) into throwing them a bone?  It just all seems unnatural.  Did Heidi really just walk away from Spencer when she clearly caught him not telling her that her sister had been looking for her?  I wanted to scream - HEIDI - HE'S A LIAR!  AND A LOSER!  AND HE HAS CHIN-PUBES!  But it seems that Heidi ain't looking for opinions about her new hubby.  Probably because she's perfectly aware of the general concensus that he's a first-class asshole.

The simple fact that Heidi and Spencer got married when ALL we see is them fighting is testament that my concern is valid.  I have to say, I think The Hills should run for them before they sink so low, they'll have to re-name it The Valley...

This post is dedicated to my sister, Karyn.